by Olivia Meggs

This month, KBR is hosting an “Encourage Your Siblings Challenge.” Throughout the month, we are posting articles written by other sisters with ideas on how to invest in and encourage our siblings. As you take the challenge this month, we would love to hear what projects YOU have done together with your siblings. Email your ideas to us to share with other KBR readers!

The Meggs Siblings

“Behold, how good and how
pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!”
{Psalm 133:1} 

Sharp answers . . . judging assumptions . . . don’t we all have those moments when it seems like our siblings are trying to annoy us on purpose? If you answered yes, then you are on the same page as I was a year ago. It seemed to me, that no matter how hard I tried, our relationships just did not get any better. I tried using every technique that came to mind to change my siblings – I told myself that if my siblings would just stop being noisy and careless, life would be so much easier! “If our siblings change, our relationships with them will become better, right?”

Wrong. Nothing could be farther from the truth! Ultimately, we are responsible for making sure our relationships with younger siblings are wholesome, uplifting and fun. Our sinful nature tells us that our siblings (not ourselves) are the wrongdoers and that we cannot be happy unless they change. However, the key to a good relationship is realizing that you are the problem, the provoker, and the biggest stumbling block. You are the cause of the hurt, strife and annoyance. You may say, ‘But wait – isn’t there any way I can have a good relationship without humbling myself? You just don’t understand!’ Because I am a sinful human just like you, I can say with all truthfulness, that I truly do understand! That was my reaction to my siblings in the past. I am here to tell you what I had to learn the hard way: Your relationship will never change unless you change first. You must chose to refuse to become annoyed with your little brother, when he comes for the fifteenth time while you are in the middle of a hard Algebra problem. Refuse to be irritated when they make a mess. My relationship with my younger brothers and sisters did not get better until I realized that I was the problem, and through God’s grace strove to be an encourager to them – accepting my siblings just as they are. Am I saying that younger siblings never sin? Absolutely not! However, our focus should be to change our heart and let God do the work in theirs. That is the only way to have a godly and fun relationship with our brothers and sisters!

I would like to share with you several activities I have used to reach out to my siblings.

• We girls like to dress in nice clothes and take pictures together outdoors. My sisters really enjoy having an afternoon to play around with different styles and fun poses.
• We will go into the kitchen and bake something together. Two of my sisters, brothers, and I really enjoy searching for healthy, fun and tasty recipes to make for the family.
• We enjoy going outside and playing sports together, as well as practicing different forms of gymnastics. It makes a great work out and often produces laughs among us, as one sibling will do a couple of flops!
• I will dig out all of my old dolls and their accessories and then build a house out of chairs, pillows, and bins for my youngest sister to play with. Often a little water in a cup for tea, some music of her choice playing and the freedom to wear one of my pretty dresses makes her very happy!

Sisters Jane & Alice F.

• Four of us can play piano and we enjoy each taking a section of the piano keyboard to play duets together.  Because we all have different styles and ideas, our combinations can be quite interesting!
• We all enjoy singing together. We will each take a part and experiment with different songs and instruments. Two of my younger sisters and I enjoy singing while one of us plays fiddle and my brother plays guitar.
• I personally love any drama or play and have taught my younger siblings to do the same! Whether acting out a play we have written or a story we have read, it is always fun to dress up and pretend different periods in history.
• My older brothers each have very unique personalities and views on different subjects. Taking the time to listen to chick brooder plans or about a gun they hope to buy can certainly make their day. After a long day of college or work, I can minister to them by listening as they talk. This encouragement opens up many doors and they will come again for input.

Sisters Danielle & Leah H.

I am not perfect; however, I can truthfully say that I enjoy being with my younger siblings. I am the most happy when all six of us girls are together, having fun! Do not be discouraged and think it is too late for your relationship to improve – start changing your own heart and reactions and you will be amazed at how your siblings will respond. Continually thank God for your younger siblings and be a “door opener.” We serve an awesome God who extends grace and mercy to all – follow Jesus’ example as you seek to love your brother and sisters. “Being found in fashion as a man, [Jesus] humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross” (Philippians 2:8).

Olivia Marie Meggs (15)
fourthborn of ten children

Enjoy this month’s special computer desktop wallpaper: